Vayechi

Genesis 47:28–50:26

D'var Torah By Charles A. Kroloff for ReformJudaism.org

How Shall We Bless Those Who Come After Us?

According to Jewish tradition, on the eve of Shabbat and holidays, before reciting kiddush, parents bless their children.

You can find these blessings in Mishkan T'filah, the siddur (prayer book) of the Reform Movement. There you will see that sons are blessed with these words: "May God inspire you to live like Ephraim and Manasseh."1 Rashi teaches that the blessing for boys is based on Genesis 48:20 in this week's parashah, when Jacob blesses his grandsons, the sons of Joseph.

There is no equivalent blessing for daughters in the Five Books of Torah. But there is a blessing in the Book of Ruth (4:11) that comes close: "May God make the woman who is coming into your house [Ruth] like Rachel and Leah, both of whom built up the House of Israel." And so in many Jewish homes today, one or both parents offer this blessing found in Mishkan T'filah2 to their daughters: "May God inspire you to live like Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah."

I remember the first time that I witnessed this ceremony. When we were graduate students in Israel, my wife Terry and I were invited to Shabbat dinner at the home of dear friends in Tel Aviv. I was spellbound as the father placed his hands on the heads of his children and spoke those blessings. At that moment, I felt a profound connection to my Jewish past and future, and to my family. I promised myself in that dining room in Tel Aviv that if we were fortunate enough to have our own children, I would offer those blessings to our offspring.

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Vayigash

Genesis 44:18−47:27

Does God Have a Plan for You?

Charles A. Kroloff for ReformJudaism.com
After receiving bad news or experiencing a tragic event, people will sometimes respond with the words, "It's God's will." There's even a Yiddish phrase that captures the idea, "It's bashert," meaning it was meant to be.

What is your reaction to such a response? Are you comfortable with it? Or does it fall on unreceptive ears? Is it in keeping with your philosophy of life or does it rub you the wrong way?

In this week's parashah, Vayigash, Joseph reassures his brothers that they should not feel guilty about the way they treated him. They had good reason to be frightened and harbor guilt. After all, they had tossed Joseph into a pit and sold him to passing merchants who led the lad into servitude in Egypt.

But Joseph tells his brothers not to fear, because ". . . it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you. There have already been two years of famine in the land, and (there remain) five more years without plowing or harvesting. So God sent me ahead of you to assure your survival in the land, and to keep you alive for a great deliverance" (Genesis 45:5-7).

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Shabbat Hanukkah, Mikeitz

Genesis 41:1−44:17

 A pious and beloved but poorly dressed Chasidic rebbe took a lengthy train ride to teach Torah in a town far away. The well-to-do passenger seated next to him subjected him to insult and verbal abuse for most of the ride. When the train finally reached its destination, the rebbe was greeted at the station by thousands of excited disciples, anxious to learn at his feet. The disrespectful passenger looked mortified as he saw the scene unfold. "I'm so ashamed," he said. "I had no idea who you were. Please accept my apologies." The rebbe turned to him and said, "Don't apologize to me. Apologize to the anonymous nobody you sat next to on the train. When you insulted me, you did so because in your eyes, I was a nobody."

    (Chasidic tale, adapted from Erica Brown's retelling)

In this week's parashah, the sons of Jacob travel to Egypt during the famine to obtain food from Joseph, the estranged brother they no longer recognize. Joseph maintains his anonymity in order to test his brothers. Have they changed since they betrayed him more than two decades earlier? Have they learned how to act like brothers who take care of each other, or do old rivalries and jealousies hold sway? If he reveals himself too soon, his brothers might feign remorse in order to win his favor.

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Vayeishev

Genesis 37:1−40:23

D'var Torah By David Segal for ReformJudaism.com

To paraphrase Mark Twain, "clothes make the [story]." Throughout the course of Parashat Vayeishev, references to clothing accentuate and propel the unfolding drama.

Joseph's Clothes Spell Trouble

As the parashah opens, the tension between Joseph and his brothers reaches its boiling point. They conspire to kill him out of jealousy, for he is their father's favorite son, but Reuben convinces them not to go that far. "So when Joseph came to his brothers, they stripped Joseph of his coat, the coat of many colors that he had on; then they took him and threw him into a pit . . ." (Genesis 37:23-24). It is darkly poetic that the brothers' first act of violence against Joseph attacks his clothing, the special coat given him by Jacob as a sign of paternal favoritism. With Joseph out of the picture, the coat becomes the brothers' vehicle for revenge against Jacob, too. They stain it with goat's blood and show it to Jacob as false evidence that Joseph has been killed. "Do you recognize it?" (Genesis 37:32) they ask Jacob, rhetorically and cruelly. The sight of the special coat, now torn and bloodied, breaks Jacob's heart.

What Goes Around . . .

After Joseph's capture and sale into Egyptian slavery, an episode about Judah and Tamar interrupts the narrative. Judah has three sons with his Canaanite wife, Shua: Er, Onan, and Shelah. Tamar marries Er, who dies; Judah sends his next son Onan to perform his brotherly duty by marrying Tamar in order that he might sire an heir for Er.1 Onan famously refuses and dies. Judah, fearing the death of his third and final son, dodges the responsibility of having Shelah marry Tamar by sending her to her father's house to wait "until my son Shelah grows up" (Genesis 38:11). Tamar waits, and even after Shelah reaches marriageable age, Judah balks.

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Vayishlach

Genesis 32:4−36:43

Chasing Your Demons: Finding Your Friend

D'var Torah By: Charles A. Kroloff for ReformJudaism.com

Many years ago, I conducted a funeral for a man who died at the age of ninety-four. What I remember most about that funeral was not the fact that he had achieved national recognition as a biologist, but rather that he had four daughters and none of them spoke to each other. I still see them in my mind's eye at the synagogue service, and later at the cemetery, purposely sitting apart and avoiding even the slightest contact with one another.

I thought about them as I read this week's parashah, Vayishlach. After Jacob tricked Esau out of his birthright blessing, Jacob fled his home, spent twenty years in the service of his abusive uncle, Laban, and then stealthily, with his wives and children in tow, hurried back to Canaan where he knew he might encounter disaster at the hands of his brother.

In Genesis 32, he stops running. After fording the Jabbok River, he remains alone and wrestles with someone until dawn brakes. One of the great questions of biblical literature is: "With whom did Jacob wrestle?" It seems clear that he wrestled with God because he said, "I have seen God face-to-face" (Genesis 32:31). And yet, the text tells us that "a man wrestled with him" (32:25). That man might have been his vision of Esau or perhaps he was struggling with himself. Haven't we all struggled with our fears and vulnerabilities at some time in the dead of night? Jacob anticipated Esau's arrival with a small army. That's enough for a nightmare.

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